I gave you everything I had–
Laid myself bare before you
During candlelit nights
As the world slept
And our conversation was a whisper
Only we could hear.
We grew together and it became
Impossible to know
Where I stopped
And where you began.
You were a part of me, you were able
To complete my sentences.
How can you now refuse me?
You meet my pleading eyes
With a cold, blank stare.
You brazenly touch others
The way you used to touch me, and leave me
Waiting, wanting more.
They talk about you, your insight,
As if you are brilliant–
Some kind of wonderful.
Let me remind you, Darling–
You were nothing until me. I can destroy you
And erase your memory in an instant.
But I’ll just sit back and let you be. Go ahead–
Have your way with unsuspecting strangers
Whose eyes you catch and whose hearts
You capture. Let it remind me always
That there is nothing more egotistical, more self-centered
Than a poem.
June 30, 2009 at 4:03 pm
i love it!
June 30, 2009 at 4:55 pm
Very nice! 🙂
June 30, 2009 at 5:08 pm
i had much problem with it along the way
but i just love the end !!!
so true…
well said..
June 30, 2009 at 5:28 pm
That’s amazing. What a great turn. That twist at the end is more than I could ever have imagined and was jarring enough that I laughed aloud.
Okay, that makes me a moron, doesn’t it? I don’t drool; should I start to match my ignorance?
Great job.
June 30, 2009 at 5:34 pm
What a delight! And DarcKnyt, I laughed aloud too.
June 30, 2009 at 5:53 pm
Wow! “erase your memory in an instant” love it!! I too didn’t like where this was heading but you knocked me off balance and I don’t know which hit first, the grin or the laughter.
June 30, 2009 at 6:02 pm
I really enjoyed reading this one, Danielle. The ending came as quite a surprise. It made me smile; it wasn’t what I was expecting.
Great poem, and very original.
June 30, 2009 at 6:16 pm
You bugger you! LOL I didn’t see that last line lurking around that last corner and them WHAM! It was brilliant. That’s it, you indubitably a power poet. 🙂
June 30, 2009 at 9:29 pm
Thank you all so much for your kind words! I am smiling from ear to ear knowing you got a smile or giggle out of this one:) How blessed am I to be amongst such generous people!
I must admit the inspiration for this one was truly born of frustration…I was feeling completely uninspired so I decided to waste some time adding pages to my blog:) In doing so, I realized some of the poetry I wrote a while ago just didn’t feel the same to me–the “magic” was gone. I was tempted to delete a few of them but then decided to leave them up even though they didn’t speak to me in the same way anymore. Darn those fickle words! 🙂
June 30, 2009 at 10:53 pm
Great poem! I was waiting for the dagger to strike but not quite like it did. Looking forward to more from your pen.
June 30, 2009 at 11:15 pm
Love the ending twist! Seemed to lead to something so different, powerful, spiteful even, and suddenly, the last line brought a smile! =D Great job!
-.Raspberries.~
July 2, 2009 at 4:39 pm
So happy to see you again, Miss R! Thanks for stopping in and I’m so glad you got a smile out of it. 🙂
July 1, 2009 at 12:21 am
Ha! I love this.
I’ve told people that I don’t like finding myself a poet, because poetry can be so damn arrogant! Now if they don’t understand, I’ll refer them here. 🙂
July 2, 2009 at 4:39 pm
Thanks Pamela. It’s nice to know I’m not the only one who feels this way:)
July 1, 2009 at 2:22 am
This is brilliant, I have felt exactly this way before-
“Let me remind you, Darling–
You were nothing until me. I can destroy you
And erase your memory in an instant.”
Ah, I love it!!
July 2, 2009 at 4:40 pm
Thank you epilogue! I’m very pleased to “meet” you and would love to visit your blog, if you have one….do you?
July 1, 2009 at 11:14 am
Wow… great composition… powerful words, with a touch of vengence and loads of wry humor!!
My first visit here, most certainly wont be the last… read some of your poems… loved every single one I read!!
July 2, 2009 at 4:42 pm
Dear Dark, thank you so much for such kind words! I am so glad to “meet” you and just thrilled that you enjoyed spending time here! 🙂
July 1, 2009 at 12:49 pm
A perfect, perfect poem.
July 2, 2009 at 4:42 pm
Thanks my friend:)
July 1, 2009 at 8:33 pm
I love that twist!
July 2, 2009 at 4:43 pm
Thanks Susan 🙂 Looking forward to reading some more of your good stuff. BTW–love your “Letter” blog 🙂
July 1, 2009 at 9:21 pm
Sometimes, most of the time. You just give them enough rope, and they will hand their selves. 😉
July 2, 2009 at 4:43 pm
😉
July 3, 2009 at 1:50 am
Loved it! Thank you for sharing your talent! I certainly will be back.
July 3, 2009 at 11:01 am
So happy to see you here! Thank you so much:) I love your blog as well, it is so peaceful and inspired, and I will be a regular visitor:)
July 3, 2009 at 11:35 am
At first I was like, awww, a sweet love poem… and then the turn came… and something sinister stepped out. That finish? Excellent.
July 3, 2009 at 11:40 am
Why, thank you Mr. Grin:) So happy to see you here…
July 3, 2009 at 1:59 pm
Fabulous! Haven’t posted the love and loss ones of Howard, yet. Something to look forward to.
July 3, 2009 at 9:36 pm
Glad you made your way here, Sara! Thanks for the compliment and taking the time to comment. I’ll be visiting soon:)
July 6, 2009 at 10:42 pm
Oh, this is just fabulous. I wish others were able to hear your voice in their heads while reading this poem…hearing your inflection and sarcasm just polish this little gem. Aside from the humor, I love your ability to take the inate and give it such personality – you are so gifted, you could bring a paper-clip to life and have us asking for more of its life story –
July 7, 2009 at 9:36 pm
Thank you Della. You’re ridiculously biased but I’ll take it anyway:)
July 15, 2009 at 10:44 pm
What a slam dunk here! Never saw that coming! I love those kinds of poems…they taunt and tease, seduce and sway, then slam and screw your brains out.